You know you're getting old when your back starts going out more than you do

I asked Maxine, a physio friend at work, for a quick consultation (saving myself about £50!), because I have had a pain in my arm since before last Christmas. Anyone that knows me well, will know that when I go to sleep at night I go into virtual unconsciousness, but the pain has been waking me up in the early hours from my comatosed state - unheard of.

Maxine diagnosed a chronic rotary cuff injury, which may improve with the correct exercise regime.Just two pieces of equipment are necessary for my exercise routine: a resistance band and a can of coke. I didn't have any coke, so I'm using a tin of tomatoes. My family must have noticed this item beside the bed, but have not questioned me about it. It reminds me of a couple of years ago when I had a bag full of knitted boobs next to my bed for several weeks. No one asked me about them either!

Maxine also gave be the once over generally and was shocked at how weak my arm, back and shoulder muscles were. She told me that a woman of my age should have a wider range of movement and not be feeling all these aches and pains. I thought that what I have been feeling was normal and to be expected of someone in their late forties! Apparently, as far as my musculo-skeletal system is concerned, I am about as fit as your average O.A.P.